Why in the world would you want to blog when no one reads it?
There they go again, those damn voices, running through my head: Who are you to think you could write a blog? You’re not an expert at anything, are you? You don’t have a creative arts degree, don’t bloggers need that to write a blog? You aren’t qualified, are you? WTH?
Shut up already!
Nope, I’m none of those things. It’s just me. An ordinary, 53-year-old; with a quirky, adventuresome take on life and I write a blog. Period.
Tell me I can’t, and I’ll say, “Well…why not?”
I’m not new to writing.
In high school, I wrote a journal. For some reason, I kept it. I came across it last year (jeez…last year, it was only yesterday…). “There’s no reason I should leave behind my high school journal. Depressing sh*t I wouldn’t want anyone, let alone my kids to read again when I’m gone. It has no place here.” I sat down, read it again, finished the dismal details, and tossed it in a bag. Burning things is cathartic.
There you have it, my first documented experience at writing, gone up in glorious smoke.
The perfect motivation to start a blog, right?
Last November, (only a 60 days ago!) I took a different approach to my blogging. A learning approach, to discover what it is really about. (I started the blog a year before that when I decided to go gray. One successful endeavor at a time folks!). I’ve been keeping track of why I blog ever since. I find it important to see growth don’t ya know?
With mediocre stats and daily practice under my belt, I said, “Enough is enough.” I set goals and jumped in with all 4 feet (actually 5′ 3 1/2″ inches of me).
And then, there I sat. Wondering what the hell I was doing.
No matter what ‘how-to’ I read, or where I looked, there were successful bloggers, those in between, and those starting out. I was stymied. Where did I fit in? I had no clue.
Right there in front of me was a challenge.
I had a motivational conversation with myself, “Holy crap, this isn’t high school all over again. Where do I fit in? Do I fit in? How in the hell do I navigate when I’m the teacher and the student at the same time?”
I knew I had to stop thinking like that, after all, “I’m older, wiser, and I know it isn’t that I lacked motivation.” I wrote a post every day (almost…mostly, okay, so, yeah, on occasion I did take a break…) leading up to 11/1/17. I created a habit I enjoy (crave). So, it had to be something else? But what?
Look around…what do you see…two inquisitive (empathetic) eyes looking back at thee… She’s adorable…and so wise for her age. My youngest daughter said, “Sorry to say it, Mom, but you have to reach out to other people. You can’t just blog and not get yourself out there by commenting and sharing with other bloggers.”
(There they were, echoing in my head, the scariest words ever…commenting and sharing; commenting and sharing; commenting and sharing; wasn’t writing all I needed to do?…I’m defeated; I’m an introvert, we don’t do that kind of stuff; sure if someone contacts me, yeah, I can, but…to be the first to reach out…oh, my, I don’t know if I can?)
What did I do? I ventured out into the cold, invested time reaching out, and ran back to safety as needed. That darn comfort zone drew me in until I’d remind myself of the goal.
The hell with it – the only one that knows I’ve been hiding is ME (and now you…)! After tracking my progress for the past 60 days, I’m here to say, my lack of knowledge about reaching out into the blogging world held me back.
60 days ago, I was tickled with my stats of 1 view (at least someone read it). I looked closer and discovered – I was my one and only true fan. An important fan I was (am). On that sad day, I told my husband and he said, “I read your blog every day.” Okay, so maybe I wasn’t my only fan. That 1 view stat kept me writing each day.
My hopes of reaching someone else, someday, we’re secondary all along. Now that I’ve finally had some fellow bloggers reach out to me, and me to them, it’s a whole new exciting part of conversational blogging! Despite what I started to think about myself, I’m not too old to make new friends.
As a 50-something, learning-as-I-go-blogger, I am a-o-kay with not knowing everything there is to know about WordPress. It’s the chase of learning something new and meeting people I enjoy. And blogging is the place to do just that.
Finally, it is a great feeling to leave behind those (horrible; no good; leave behind me; good riddance) voices saying, “Oh, I don’t know…that’s pretty scary stuff, and yep, that’s why no-one is reading your blog.”
Wow.. i am craving to hear your best life lessons.
Aw, thank you! I appreciate your encouragement. I look forward to seeing what you lessons you learn, too!
Dear Shelley,
I loved this blog. So honest and charming, and so much of what I’m experiencing now, trying to worm my way into the world of our bloggers. You write well, my #1 requirement for enjoying a blog. And your nice soul comes thru with your photos and words. Your husband and offspring sound quite wonderful. I’m slipping into envy!! Help!!!
Ellen, your kind words of encouragement warm my soul! I admire your perseverance and YOU write well, I enjoy reading your blog posts! Let’s challenge each other in 2018 to figure this blogging stuff out…are you game? Hugs to you! xx
Lovely post Shelley, don’t doubt yourself, you are good enough for today and tomorrow holds endless prospects for growth and development! Can you count me into your challenge please!? And if so, can I ask for a kind comment and then a constructive comment that might help me improve my writing and blogging skills!
Thank you, Marie! Your encouraging words mean so much to me. Absolutely, you’re counted in on the challenge. Ditto to you, I love how you phrased that – 1 kind and 1 constructive comment to help us improve!! I’m looking forward to 2018 and what we discover together.
Sounds good to me!
Yay!! I’m looking forward to it!
I liked reading this. A reflection of what I think at times: Who am I writing for? At times I find I’m my one fan, which still counts for something. I started out, slightly overwhelmed by the bits and bobs of WordPress. I keep it simple and try not to meddle with the blog settings. I write and post and like hearing back from others. I think the reward comes with typing out thoughts. Storing whatever might be pressing at the time. And then – reaching out and connecting. Views and likes have their place, but the true purpose is in sharing the words. Thanks for sharing your feelings on reaching out, beyond your comfort zone.
Lauren, thank you, for stopping by to read my post and for sharing your words of wisdom. Very astute of you! You’re correct, it is about sharing words! Speaking of words…I love your clever blog title “thinkoutsidethetoaster”! Happy 2018 to you!!
I’m happy to stop by to read what you have shared with the world. Agreed that it’s the real meaning in all of this. And thank you by the way- I eat way too much toast (if that’s possible), so I thought that should reflect a bit in this blog I created. Happy 2018 to you too! Cheers to a beautiful and inspiring year.
Lauren, thank you for stopping by to take a peek at my blog post! I look forward to reading more about your toastcapades! Yes, and cheers to you for 2018! xx
Yes indeed! Toasting to this year. And thank you as well! I’m happy to share these adventures ! : )
It’s going to be a great year!!
I read your blog! (I had a very long comment but somehow it vanished) oh well.
https://wordpress.com/view/diaryofamadretiree.wordpress.com
Hi Cindi, sorry to hear there was difficulty! I wasn’t able to click the link you left either? Thanks for stopping by, it’s great to hear from you! Happy New Year!
Happy New Year Shelley!
Happy New Year to you, too, Cindi!
Shelley, try this link:
https://diaryofamadretiree.wordpress.com/
WordPress changed the settings on me. Ugh. Technology!
Let me know if this new link works.
Cindi, yes that link worked! Happy 2018 – I wish you continued joy and reconciliations for 2018. Glad to read you and your daughters are talking again! Hugs, xxx
Shelley, it’s as if nothing ever happened! Kids! Go figure! Thanks.
LOL! Yes, those darn kids! You’re welcome!! Stay in touch!!
Another post fully identified with. We’ve had a travel blog for several years now which shows off our world travels in retirement. 300+ followers who seemed interested in places and photos, easy to write too. But more and more we found ourselves posting about political stuff, philosophical stuff that nobody read, so why bother? Then one day an American friend said to us, if you really care about something you MUST bother to write, so ….. we started a separate blog which communicates our personal rants about Brexit, terrorism, city no go areas, useless politicians, cultural marxists etc. Stopped caring whether anyone reads it or not.
Thank you, I appreciate hearing when my post relates to others. It seems to me it isn’t the easiest thing to find those interested in reading posts? 300 followers is a nice number. I do agree, it is important to write about what you want to write about, it makes it your own, and motivational in a sense? I look forward to hearing from you again and wish you well on your two blogs!
Shelley, You are my hero. I have been surveying the landscape for 24 hours straight, it seems (it’s a long story) and I finally came across you. Thank you, Shelley.
Hi Donna, thank you for the vote of confidence! I appreciate hearing from you and look forward to learning more about your long story! Keep on keeping on, you won’t regret it! Hugs,xx
What you wrote resonated with me! I am an introvert and the thought of reaching out to connect with other bloggers pushes me out of my comfort zone. I hear the inner critic jabbering on, but I’m taking little steps to grow my blog (whatever that means).
I get excited about 1 reader too on the stats and just shake my head that this is just pointless. I’m enjoying it so it can’t be that. So glad to hear that you have quieted the critic and gone forward with blogging. You go girl!
Thank you, Esther, I appreciate the feedback and you sharing your insights on my post. I agree with you, as an introverted blogger, reaching out to each other is a form of comfort zone stretching. I’m still a sucker for the stats on days, but then I shake my head too and get on with writing. I’m glad to hear you’ve done the same. You keep blogging too and stay in touch – I look forward to seeing what you’ve learned. xx