The bikini arrived

The retail therapy session yesterday was exhausting.  I got quite the workout in, though.

Since we have so much snow around here, I dressed appropriately for the weather.  I wore jeans, two layers of shirts, heavy socks, and hiking boots, under my scarf and winter coat.

I left the house at 10:45 am and returned at 2:45 pm.  There were long lines at the store so it took longer than expected.  Every time I’d think it was time to check out, the line was too long, so I’d keep shopping.  And, of course, I then had to try on everything, sometimes twice.

I regretted the hiking boots – what a pain to take on and off.

I was starting to get weak and dehydrated.  I needed to stop.

Even if I had 30% off, I was pushing limits due to hallucinations involving those damn mirrors in the changing rooms.  I swear they make you look better than you really do.

It’s a conspiracy, I tell ya.

Meanwhile, at the home front, the long-awaited swimsuit package arrived.  It wasn’t supposed to arrive until Monday.

As I entered the house, Mr. said, “Yep, your package arrived!”

The teenie weenie itsy bitsy colorful bikini…

I ran upstairs, tore open the package.  Out of the bag’s shadows, I pulled out each piece.  I stood there stunned.

It was a lot smaller than I imagined it would be.  The pink tankini has to go back, it was weird.

Dang…that left the bikini and the shorts.

WTH was I thinking?

Voices in my head…”It’s finally here, baby, you have to try it on – there’s no turning back now.”

I pulled the bottoms on over my underclothes – ‘cuz that’s what you’re supposed to do, right?

Sh*t, it barely covered the underwear.  Fabric and skin bulging out everywhere.  And it was damn snug tight.

Maybe it was just the mirror?

Yeah, I definitely need to get new mirrors?  Wonder if they sell dressing room mirrors on Amazon.com?

I only had the energy to try on the bottoms.

Yikes, what a scare!

I put it all back into the package as fast as I could.  And stood there looking at the Kohl’s bag.

Mr. brought me some nourishment to help me recover from the shopping trip.  Or maybe he wandered into the room because he wanted to sneak a peek?

He’s brave.  He’s smart too, he knows it’s hard to tell what kind of mood I’d be in after shopping.  He glanced at the size of the bag.  It indicated it was a productive trip.

He stood there waiting for me to talk first.

I sighed, huffed, and then replied, “NOPE, not gonna happen!  That thing is so teenie…!”

I did think that the shorts would work, though, so I kept them out of the package.

I continued the workout and re-tried on everything I bought at Kohl’s and put back over 1/2 of it into the bag to return to the store.

I tell ya, mirrors don’t lie.

I asked for a glass of wine with dinner, while I sulked.

About me and my pour choices.

After dinner full of excellent comfort food, I felt better, sort of.  I had two helpings, including a breadstick.  And cheesecake, not just one, but two pieces and maybe a few bites more, and probably another glass of wine.  I was still hungry.

So I broke down again, not into a bag of Tostitos – ‘cuz, nope, they weren’t gonna cut it – I needed more…so I went for the party in my mouth stuff.

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Mr. said, “I can’t believe you’re still eating.  Aren’t you stuffed yet?  Wait to see how you feel tomorrow, you might change your mind about the swimming suit.”

Mr. was right, I did feel different this morning.  Good and bloated always makes a girl feel different.

Always remember, your focus determines your reality. – George Lucas

And, oh…goodie, it’s snowing again.

I sighed.  Grabbed a cup of coffee and pondered things.

The day before it was sunny at night, today it is snowing and gloomy.  I can’t let the bad weather get the best of me.

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Good thing I’ve got time to recover from my indulgence before the trip.  I can recover from yesterday’s binges, yes, I can!

I had a serious talk with myself.

Here’s the deal.  I’ve been busting my arse to go for it and wear a bikini at 54 years of age.  Dammit…I need to get back to the focused goal.

So, I got the package out again.

I do like swimming shorts, they still fit.

The whole bikini fits inside them nicely.

The question at hand is, “Do I, or will I fit into the teenie weenie other pieces at hand…?”

It’s a long winter…and since I wasn’t here when the delivery truck came the day before, I couldn’t chase him down to return the package…

I got brave.

I tried the two pieces on with a renewed sense of coffee-fueled WTH…you only live once attitude.

And…it actually fit.  It’s so tight, I can’t take it off.  It’s like it is painted on.  My 54-year old skin looks nothing like the models, either.  But why not go for it?  I can always put the shorts on over it.

I stepped out of the closet, showed Mr. to see if the mirrors were semi-accurate.  He approved.  I tell ya, he’s smart, knows when to speak and when not to.  He did mumble something that I couldn’t share any pictures, though…

I tried on the one piece suit I bought last summer and announced it as the “age appropriate version.”  He smiled.  “That’s still cute, too.”

I’m off to do more squats…

Post Inspiration – Challenge – Fall In Love With Your Over 50-Self February #FILWYO50SF

PS – When’s the last time you dared to do something crazy for your age?