Preparing for Mr.’s Return: A Recovery Journey

I started a post 15 days ago to give you an update. Then I clicked save and walked away from my computer. I was likely out of spare time. It’s hard to come by these days. Here we are at the yearly time change, and I figure, what the heck? I have this ‘extra’ hour to see where streaming thoughts take me today.

I’ve read all your comments on the previous posts and still haven’t found time to reply. Sorry! I missed writing to you for the whole month of October too. Wow, sorry about that too. I say sorry a lot these days!

Me to Mr.: “I’m sorry I moved your arm too fast…I know it hurts!”

It’s quite a blur to remember October, let alone yesterday. Well, yesterday is fresh in my mind. Mr. had a rough day due to a medication change and soreness from an AWESOME round of OT as he learned to roll himself side to side in the bed. Big win, with lots of residual pain.

And…we moved stuff preparing the house for Mr.’s return home (date undetermined).

Our kids and their friends split and stacked wood so we have wood for the fireplace this winter. Mr. missed being there to help them – he enjoyed seeing the Snaps from our kids showing the progress. I reminded him of how we did that together just the two of us last year. He remembered. His memory is intact. And I remembered how I moved logs to build muscles. I’m building more muscles again.

Movement and recognition of his left side remain in the recovery process. Thank goodness there has been small spontaneous and deliberate movement in both his arm and left leg. Learning to roll from side to side in the bed, sit up on the side of the bed, and transfer from the bed to the wheelchair and commode uses all the core muscles that help facilitate the recovery of the left side movement. ST/PT/OT therapy sessions help the progress by therapists visiting his room 5 days a week.

The challenge of the cardiologist finding medications that don’t cause problems and control Mr.’s blood pressure at the same time has been a huge battle. He’s ultra-sensitive to every change. The last round of changes has affected his appetite too. For those of you who remember, he was the Chef of our house, and rightfully so misses his cooking, “This place overcooks everything, everything is so dry, and it doesn’t taste good so I’m not eating the food.” 🙄

My cooking, I hope will be better.

But, first, the house won’t look the same to him when he returns. Neither of us will be the same when he returns, so why not have the house be different too? It’s an odd feeling to me. This whole experience is an out-of-body one for all of us. And now, the house we’ve built together and formed to fit us and our changing lives over the 30+ years is being changed again, this time, not with him, but for him. We’ll usher him in the house in the custom wheelchair he’ll have (ETA 11/21/2024).

Will he enjoy the ride into the house on the ramp, and transfer to the stairlift (we’re not sure when it will be installed!) down to the level of the house where his office is? And where he desperately wants to go, he talks about it so often.

Will he recognize the dining room when it doesn’t have this table and chairs and likely has a hospital bed instead? Ah…the holidays around the bar room he normally decorates with our Christmas village and the dining room table will be different this year. And that’s okay.

I don’t think I’ll even decorate for the holidays this year. All we want for Christmas is to have Mr. home. So, we are preparing for that special gift.

We found a great deal on a lift chair from a lovely lady who bought it for her husband who had a stroke. He spent time at the same nursing home where Mr. is, and she only lives a mile from the NH. Finding that chair serendipidly on Facebook Market Place the day she placed the ad, and getting it for Mr. was meant to be. Tizzie likes it, so Mr. will too.

Mr. told us he wanted the chair in the corner of this room so he could enjoy sitting next to the cozy fireplace. We hope it fits there – we’ve moved the two black chairs and the wine barrel to storage. Someday…they can return.

And someday (SOON 🤞🏻) Mr. will return home and we’ll continue with the recovery from the massive stroke he had. We remind ourselves that he’s gone from not being able to breathe on his own, let alone hold his head up or turn it from side to side, to turn to locate us on the left, to do all of what he couldn’t back then, and now include sitting up on his own after we assist him. Now he can think about tiny deliberate movements of his left side. It’s a recovery miracle in the works. We celebrate all those baby steps as we prepare for his return home.

And…yes, for those wondering about me, I’m okay, I get 6 hours of solid sleep a night to dream about his return home. Seeing all the small recovery miracles each day feeds my soul with hope and love.

PS – I hope you’re doing well. I miss you. Thank you for all your comments and well wishes. Your encouragement and support help us more than you know!