As a personal blogger, it feels like every day I’m swooping in and out of feeling the highs and lows of a being a writer. It can feel awesome the days when I connect with others, receive comments and likes, and then there are the other days. The days I feel incredible loss when I don’t connect.
I take things way too personally. I guess it’s simply part of being a personal blogger. I keep fishing for ideas and hoping that I find ones that are interesting, not only for myself but for my readers as well.
Sometimes it works, and other times it doesn’t.
All I know is…wow…dang…it hurts big time to get this message.
It’s the nature of the beast of the blogging world. It can feel awkward and clumsy to get the task done. I wonder if pelicans feel down and out when they can’t find what they’re fishing for? In wildlife, the definition of a pelican includes the adjective – gregarious.
When I decided to start a blog, I wasn’t even considering the idea of it. In fact, it was the last thing on my mind. As an introvert, I’m not exactly gregarious. How in the world would I be able to write a blog?
Who in their right mind would want to share their personal life online for all the two followers to see?
I blame my youngest, she talked me into it.
She can be quite persuasive. I do adore that about her, though. She’s good at coaxing me out from the safety cover.
She even talked me into going big and buying my own domain name and starting my second blog. At that time I also ventured off into the journey of going gray. It seemed like a great thing at the time to combine the two efforts. I had grandiose ideas, not gregarious ones. All those who’ve gone before me seem to be are getting rich by sharing their stories. It looks so easy, I could be that too, right?
But, I am an introvert, that adds to the difficulty factor. And then I finished the task of going gray.
So, I was ready to quit blogging, too. I was tired of trying so hard. I had won the biggest mental battles during the going gray journey, and I frankly didn’t know if I had anything left in me or not? I was content to hide.
I told her that blog wasn’t working out as well as I hoped and I was just ready to quit. I had little to no followers, except for her. I had no idea what I was doing as a blogger. I was feeling bad that she convinced me to do a blog at all. Yikes, a horrible, mean empty nester knows it all mom comment. That’s a lot to put on the shoulders of a soon to graduate from college person.
She bounced back and quickly said, “Don’t give up. Change it up, Mom, buy a new domain name, and finally write a blog about things you’re passionate about. You’ve been practicing for a long time. And…by the way, you need to reach out to other bloggers, too.”
“What the hell am I passionate about?”
“Just like you tell me, Mom, you have to figure that out for yourself.”
“And…what do you mean, reach out to other bloggers? Other bloggers follow other bloggers blogs?”
“Yes, Mom, I can’t believe you didn’t know that?”
So I changed it up again into the blog you’re reading.
I write daily on a Personal Blog. That means I’m a writer and blogger. There – I said it, it’s the first step to conquering anything – admitting your something.
What’s a Personal Blog Space mean to me?
- A place to be who I want to be.
- A place to say what I want to say.
- A place to be just little ol’ me.
So, yeah, I’m a Personal Blogger!
Wow, wait for a second, did you do the math, too? Of course not, I hadn’t told you when I started, I just said years. Sorry, here’s the data so now you, too, can do the math. I’ve been a Personal Blogger since April of 2013.
The weather at that time was quite the same as it is now, and the two cats were, too.
And…I was determined to be random back then, and I’m still Shelley. A bit grayer around the edges, a bit wiser, a better photographer, and I’m a personal blogger.
Holy crap…six effing years, and what do I have to show for it?
Let’s count:
- On the old blog, I wrote 355 posts.
- And this blog, this post you’re reading today is my 630 post.
As humans, we are desperate for proof that we’ve done something. We all do the counting thing. Does what I do matter? That sucks, in a way if you want to be a personal blogger. But, on the flip side, it keeps us persevering. We keep trying. And that’s a really cool thing about us personal bloggers.
The Ups of Personal Blogging:
- A creative outlet – I call it cheaper than therapy and better for me than drinking.
- A space I call my own in a virtual world that seems bigger than the ocean.
- No pressure – I can put what I want on myself.
- What I see in the world around me is my limit.
- Not a day goes by that I don’t feel joy when I finish a post.
The Downs of Personal Blogging:
- Doubts about ‘am I good enough’.
- It can be really lonely.
- It can feel very awkward and not worth the effort.
- It can feel daunting to try to stand out in the blogosphere.
- Not a day goes by that I wonder if I have connected with someone or not.
I think pelicans must feel the same way (if they had feelings…). If the analogy can sort of fit, use it I say. Pelicans and bloggers should keep trying, keep fishing, keep dropping in with new ideas and keep up with the task of flying off to find something else to write about.
Heck, even give YouTube another chance.
By taking the chance to share even your really crappy work, you’ll eventually get over the need for perfection, too! And you’ll learn to love the highs and lows of being a Personal Blogger.
Post Inspiration – A-Z Blogging Challenge 2019 – P – if you’ve got the time, please head on over and check out Arlee’s post today where Jayden talks about passion in blogging.
PS – How about you, do you ever feel like a pelican? What are your favorite parts of being a personal blogger? What are your least favorite parts? Do you ever feel discouraged when someone unfollows you? What makes your day when you post a blog post you love? Have you found your passion yet? Do tell…what did you think of my video?
First off, the pelican video is very cool. Not sure I’ve ever seen one up that close. And the sound of the waves is always welcome. 🙂
I admire your tenacity in keeping it up all this time. I’m learning to play the harp (a HARD instrument, even when you have played several others over time), and one of my fellow harpists said we need to focus on how well we have played an entire piece, not the three notes we missed. That can pretty much be applied to any activity in life. We are all (especially women, IMO) way too hard on ourselves. Pat yourself on the back for all the great posts you’ve done and keep it up. Cheers!
Thank you, I’m glad you enjoyed the video. It was fun to capture as I stood in the waves.
I’m touched by your words of encouragement, they mean a lot to me. Yes, we are hard on ourselves as women. The Harp – OMG, I can’t imagine how hard that must be to learn to play. I played the clarinet and piano (gave up both), and I’m in awe of people who carried through with learning instruments. That is great advice on how we should focus on the bigger (no pun intended on the size comparison of a harp to a clarinet ;-)) picture. Cheers to you – and thank you for reading my blog post ramblings, I appreciate hearing from you!
Shelley, I feel like pitching the whole blog thing sometimes, as I doubt I bring much to the blog table. However, I continue, in an albeit iffy and very part-time way, because I find it enriching. Maybe I’ll do more, maybe I won’t, but I send posts out into the world when I have something to say. I love your blog!
Oh, my, I’m so there many a days, but like you, I find it enriching and fun. Especially when I can chat with people like you! Aw, thank you, I appreciate your encouragement. I love your blog too. I hope you keep sharing your something to say, your sense of humor is heart-warming! xx
The toughest thing is not even to find enough to talk/bitch/rant about, it’s HOW to write it so it doesn’t come off too standoffish. Because if I write that way I feel like I’m alienating the few friends I’ve made in the blog world.
You are right to have a personal blog as an empty nester. Think of all the insights you can share about the highs and lows of this for the up and coming empty nesters…how one rediscovers themselves as a person, a woman, who is not *just* a parent (because we all know you don’t cease to be a parent when the minions fly the nest). Someone who has shifted her personality, her character. All the insecurities from our youth may still be there but have a new dimension to how we see these insecurities, or challenges.
Go to your reader and create a tag called empty nesters, or midlife, or middle age and go visit some people there, see what they have to say. They may provide some inspiration. 🙂
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and insights, Claudette. I agree, I fear the alienation factor, too. I love the line we don’t cease to be a parent when the minions fly the nest. I also love your blog & writing style, I’m never offended, it is about your real feelings, that’s what I enjoy about it most. Great idea on the tag search, I’m going to do that!! 🙂
I didn’t know you have been blogging this long, cool! You don’t seem like an introvert to me, Shelley. I look forward to reading your posts each day. Keep up the great work my friend! 😬😎
Yes, I was surprised at the length of time too. Time flies really fast once one hits midlife?! Thank you for your encouragement – I so appreciate it! And I enjoy your photography blog – it reminds me that there is a big world out there with much to see. Keep snapping those great shots!
Thanks! Were you using Blogger initially? That’s where I started, then came WordPress.
Yes, Blogger – it was easy to use and free.
Yeah it was, I had some good times on that platform for probably two years before moving to WP. I’ve used a bit over 50% of my storage allocation at this point, not wanting to delete old content when the time comes. Decision time…
Yes, it was a nice way to start blogging. Oh, no…I’m sure I’m pushing my storage limits too. Photos are just so darn fun to use! Hmm…wonder what you’ll decide to do?
Well, I compress each image below one megabyte as much as possible. I currently have 3,835 posts published which is why I rarely upload any video Shelley. It’s either move off of WP, delete hundreds of posts or purchase that damned Business plan that WP offers for $300 per year. That’s greedy as WP used to offer space upgrades for a modest price. It’s not the same WP as when I started blogging around 2002 or so.
I’m assuming that my widget or plugin takes care of sizing of photos? Yikes…that’s a lot of photos. I use YouTube for the videos, do you have a channel with them? Yeah, their pricing is pretty high, that’s for sure. Since 2002 – WOW, that’s a LONG time. You’re a pro!!! 🙂
I’m no pro but do know my way around the WP platform Shelley. My Nikon rolling file number shows I’m almost to ten thousand photos on the Nikon D3300! I dumped everything Google at least six months ago and never used YouTube for video hosting anyway. Google is evil.
You know so many things that I don’t know, so I’m keeping an eye out for your insights!
I resize all of my photos, always know they are not too large. If you use a Mac, try Photoscape X, it’s great for resizing and photo altering.
I’ll have to talk it over with my Mr. IT person – we’re PC users so I just use what Windows provides me with.
Cool video of the pelican! I’ve seen a few, as once in awhile a few land on our lake by the house. Which to me is strange, as we are nowhere near an ocean or sea. I guess they were just passing through. 🙂
That’s awesome – I know very little about pelicans, maybe they migrate some? They are interesting to watch, though. Thank you for sharing your thoughts about the video. 🙂
I’ve only been following you for about a year, so I’m really glad you hung in there with this blogging thing. Otherwise, I would have never met you, as it were. I had a technology blog before my personal blog. It was so hard to write, because I had to have a topic and it had to be relevant – every week!.I love writing, but I hated that pressure, so I started my personal blog just for me. I still do it mainly just for me. Think of it like exercise. You may not want to ride in a race, or run a marathon, but exercise is still good for you. And, you have the bonus factor that people like reading what you write. Win-Win.
Thank you, Dan – I’m glad you stuck with the challenges of following me through my earlier bumpy figuring out meeting blogger phases. I’m glad we met, too. I enjoy reading your blog – your bar stories and your door adventures and your willingness to cut to the chase realness are all inspiring. I can read in your posts that you love writing. I like that analogy about it being like exercise, it fits! Thank you for sticking around and reading my blog ramblings. Your support means a lot to me. Plus, it is great that you get the techy problems and are willing to take a stand so the rest of us end up with better products from WP!
That was great! A good summation of how many of us feel. Blogging has given me writing practice, and loosened me up so now after 90 posts I don’t worry as much about mistakes, misplaced commas or what people think etc. An early comment by one of my friends about a spelling mistake devastated me, (plus it was her ONLY comment), I was so close to quitting in the early days. Now I find it fun, but sometimes too time-consuming. I blogged about my blogging thoughts, during First Year Blogging Anniversary last year, if you are interested, but compared it to boats and all of us being in the big WordPress sea together! The pelican analogy was good!
Thank you, Joni, I’m glad you could relate to what I wrote. I’ve felt that devastated feeling too – glad that both of us have persevered and kept on. Yes, it’s fun and sometimes too time-consuming. I find it very hard to keep up with reading let alone writing somedays.
Yes, please send me the link to your 1st year post, I’d love to read it. Happy Blogging to you.
Thanks Shelley. Here’s the link. It’s a long read, as I have not yet mastered brevity. Don’t feel you have to read all of it, but you might enjoy the paragraphs about the lack of support from friends etc. I guess we all expect other people to be as excited about our blog as we are – but I found pretty much a total lack of interest, which was hurtful at the time. I’m over it now, but then I don’t share it anymore. I still sometimes wonder if it’s a waste of time, but it’s good practice writing. My intention last summer was to cut back to two posts/month and try a murder mystery, but I only managed to get a brief 20 page outline done in Jan/Feb and only because we had two big snowstorms! I’m enjoying spring too much now to get back at it, maybe in the summer when it’s too hot to go out! https://thehomeplaceweb.com/2018/09/09/one-year-blogging-anniversary-more-or-less/
Thank you, Joni! Way to go ahead and keep writing! And enjoy spring, too, we’ve waited too long for nice weather. The weather will inspire you to write more, too.
Ps. I sent a link and comment Shelley but you may have to approve it because of the link. Let me know if you don’t get it?
I can see how much your site has evolved. It looks great. I decided when I started not to worry about numbers and just to write what I wanted. It is so nice to get followers and friends though. One small comment, Arlee from the A to Z is a man so it should be “he” talks about passion not “she.” (Although actually the post was not actually written by Arlee but by Jayden, one of the co-hosts of the A to Z who is a female so…) I am glad you are finding it so easy to join in!
Thank you, Janet. I’ve so enjoyed meeting and chatting with you and exchanging comments on our blogs. I’ve enjoyed seeing you grow with your blog too. Thank you for the correction on Arlee – I updated it!
I’m sorry personal blogging has been so difficult for you. I started small and evolved into bigger. I feel your pain, but imagine that it’s all going to get easier for you as you go along. Everyone with a heart eventually finds their own way in blogland.
Thank you for your encouragement, Ally! It’s nice to have support from those who’ve paved the way and found their niche!
I love to read your posts Shelley! We have a lot in common, e.g., grey hair, empty nest, introvert, photography and even a clarinet. 🙂 I can relate to your ups and downs. It’s hard to think of something interesting to write. Some days I beat myself up about it (why can’t I write something interesting) but then I realize it’s just working for approval which is a dark pool. Not everything is interesting to everyone. Don’t let the unsubscribers get you down. I think your blog is fabulous!
Aw, thank you! I’m so touched by your encouragement and that you’ve shared what we have in common. The clarinet too!! That’s great! I’m trying very hard to not let the unsubscribers get me down. Most days, I let it go. I think your blog is great – you’re posts are from the heart, plus I adore all your photos, too! Happy Blogging to you!
Thanks Shelley.
Shelley,
Thanks for opening up about your struggles, it gives me comfort and hope. I’ve started and stopped a ton of times with blogging. I now write with a group of friends on one blog and have my personal blog as well. That one I’ve committed to posting once a week for now. It’s what I can keep up with. And, although I’m an extrovert, it was my introvert husband who encouraged me and is my biggest fan. I’d love more followers, but I’m trying to be patient and figure out this whole blogging community. You’re a big help! xoxo
Aw, Barbara, thank you, and you’re welcome. I’m glad you found benefit in my thoughts. That is awesome that you’ve found a way to keep on writing and that your spouse is so supportive. Followers come with time, that much I’ve learned. It is a challenge to figure out all of this blogging stuff, you’re right to keep patience in mind. Thank you for sharing your thoughts! Happy Blogging to you!! xoxo
First of all, congratulations on your 630th post!! So glad you kept going even when you felt lonely.
I hope you know that yes you do stand out and have a personal voice, connect with other bloggers, and have a voice that is entirely yours. I find much encouragement and support from you as a blogger. It does get lonely and lots of self-doubt. I would be discouraged too if I got that unsubscribe message. Hard not to take it personally.
Keep doing what you’re doing!! I’m so glad we are blogger friends.
Aw, thank you, I appreciate your kind words of encouragement and your support during this journey of blogging. I adore seeing your blog grow right along with your kiddos (and of course, you growing too!). You keep up what you’re doing too, you’re making a difference, every day! I’m so glad we’re blogger friends, too. Happy Blogging to you! 🙂
Shelley, your awesome. We all have ups and downs. Sometimes our downs are so deep in the well we think we will never crawl out but God is always good and gives us a hand and shows us something awesome. I guess I look at blogging differently in that I know there are people who don’t care for what I say but I still speak from my heart or the silliness I ran across that day or …Mimi. She makes me laugh, mad, happy and sad. As long as we stay close to God’s purpose in all we do, the rest don’t matter. I have read your blog since August last year and you have always been an inspiration. Keep marching kiddo. Your doing great.
Aw, Anita, your kindness always warms my heart. I remember when we first met as blogging friends! I knew instantly your friendship was a gift I would/should value and treasure! And I continue to be inspired by you and how you stay true to your beautiful and warm self that God blessed us with. It has been fun watching you grow with your blog.
You’re doing great navigating this wonderland we jumped into! Oh, and yes, Mimi, too. She brings us all joy by being herself. Thank you for your continued support and encouragement, I appreciate you! xx
Nice job with the video – I have no idea how to do that. But it looks worth learning about. Blogging is a whole new world. I like the feeling of accomplishment after a post. And the new connections – with bloggers such as you 🙂 My least favorite part…dealing with technical difficulties!!
Happy Anniversary!
Thank you! You’re doing awesome with your blog. I love the old pictures and your sense of humor and that you shared the cookie recipe.
Which I still need to make, but can’t wait to do so! Ah, yes, the video is straight from the camera, uploaded to my YouTube channel…that’s the tricky part, and requires a bit of set-up, but once its there, it’s easy to upload videos to it. Setting up the pelican to do what he/she did, that took a trip to Jamaica 😉 to pull off. I’d highly recommend it though! Thank you again – happy blogging to you!!
Wow – your own YouTube channel!! I am impressed. Such a cool idea. And thanks for your kind words for my blog – much appreciated. Hope you like the cookies too 🙂
Well I can share your pain Shelley and Joni and I just discussed this not too long ago. I was almost 5 years with just two regular commenters and sometimes I go back to fetch a link to show someone something and there were no commenters on that post. Hmm. What I shared with Joni is that I never told anyone about my blog except my neighbor who convinced me to start a blog. Then, as I gained confidence in writing, I began to mention it to friends … so do you define friends as those who would subscribe? Or are they those that subscribe, but never comment? I have done two or three posts about a friend in New York, and sent the post links to her and she said “I’ll have to read this sometime.” You know what I thought – I won’t sully your blog by saying it here. So, that was the end of that. A very good friend has never subscribed to my blog, so I don’t mention it … it was only in November 2017, after beginning my blog in February 2013, that someone discovered my blog (I never tagged until the 5-year anniversary of it) and followed me. I was so taken aback I asked “how did you find me?” He was searching for something in his genre – my blog came up. So, as to friends, I won’t mention it anymore. I’ve discovered non-bloggers do not understand the time, effort/energy expended in having a blog. (I don’t know how you do a daily post – that is stamina and creativity and I’ve said that to you before.) Perhaps they think it is frivolous or something to pass the time. So, for the “outside world” I find it hard to keep up with them on social media, and if I get behind, I say “I’m busy with blogging” … I’ve discovered the bloggers are more loyal than my own friends are.
I can relate to your thoughts and questions.
Thank you for sharing them. I do have one dear friend who reads my posts. She hasn’t unfollowed me yet, so I take that as a good sign. But we rarely if ever talk about my blog or if she likes what I write or not? I’ve found that those who enjoy it the most are my immediate family – I make them read it and my blogging friends – like you and those who regularly comment. I adore those connections and, frankly if they weren’t there, I don’t know if I’d still be blogging or not? Blogging is my hobby. I guess if I think about it, I don’t really engulf myself in what my friends do as hobbies that are different from mine, so I really can’t expect them to go all Lady Gaga over my writing either. I’ve resolved myself that it is a good thing for me to spend time writing, it is fun for me, so, no matter what others may think of it, I’m going to keep on keeping on.
Good – don’t stop Shelley. My blog is at two different local news sites … one is a hyperlocal paper and I never get comments, though I publish on their site and they in turn publish the post on their Patch Facebook site. Nothing. One like on a squirrel post and someone said “I like squirrels too..” I wonder why I do the posts there sometimes because the photos are in a galley that you must arrow/click through and no matter how I size the pictures and center the picture using the cross-hair as they suggest, often the top or bottom of the picture does not display properly. I have to cut-and-paste the narrative in as well – very different format than WP. I’ve written them about it – no answer. I often will delete most of the pics and just say “the collection of today’s pics are found at my blog site” and put the link in. I am on the blog roll of “The News Herald” and they are a collection of newspapers in SE Michigan … no clicks or followers from there – all WordPress people. Whatever. I suspect the subscribers (friends from years ago) for the most part, just delete them. You have to just taker it with a grain of salt because I believe to be a blogger you are made of strong stuff to begin with – you are putting your labor of love out there for all to see – you are a little gutsy doing that. I have no family to share my posts with. I like how strong the blogging community is – that warms my heart.
So appreciate this post! We’ve all been in the “is this good enough?!” camp. Just have to keep trucking along 🙂
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http://www.areweadultsyet.com
I appreciate you saying so. You’re right, we all have those moments. We do just have to keep on going. I’m so glad you stopped by again – I’ve missed hearing from you. I’ll be by to check out what you’ve been up to this weekend when I catch up!!
Hi Shelley. I’m very new to this blogging and I have no expectations. Thank you for spilling how you feel. I love ready the raw and honest stuff most. You have connected with me today. Stay strong and keep up the good work.
Hi Meghan! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your feedback. I’m touched that you found my post helpful. Congrats on your new beginning in the blogosphere. Thank you for your firefighting service to those in need. Same to you, too, stay strong and keep up the good work!