Emptying the nest · Welcome

Empty Nest Santa Confesses to Losing Spirit of The List

Shelley

I’m making a list, checking it twice, gonna find out how many things I can’t seem to bring myself to do this year. I’m feeling like being a naughty Santa this year, I guess?

Instead of joyfully checking off the usual things on my holiday to-do list, I’m protesting. My list keeps on growing with things I wish I were doing all the while being pissed off at the things I ‘can’t’ be doing this year.

Scrooge mode?!

That’s not nice of me, but there are days when I feel like being naughty instead of nice!

As I stare at our little rebel tree, I’m pouting, almost crying, as I’m anticipating Christmas of 2020. I missed getting a real tree but didn’t have the heart to do it.

Our $25 4′ faux tree, took me 15 minutes to decorate. So far it’s still standing!

It’s the year where plenty of lists are made, misplaced and, forgotten. Or dismissed in frustration. Even when I’ve prepared a properly formed list, have it in my hand at the store, I still forget things.

It’s like I’ve been transported to some foreign land, certainly not even close to the North Pole. I’m wide-eyed above my mask, I must look as though I’ve gone mad?

My mind wanders as I look around at all the blingy things on the shelves that I haven’t seen in months. Should I touch or not? I do, shame on me, so I rinse with hand-sanitizer and soap.

I look around at the other shoppers. Hoping to see their spirit of Christmas, instead of the fear of a virus. I shake my head as I think back to every Christmas season when our kids were young, flu and cold season frequently hit, and kleenexes were what covered their faces. It wasn’t Christmas without a sneeze or more and a mother’s or grandmother’s lap to comfort them so.

My mom loved bears – and so did my kiddos, this one sings too!

I long to see smiles back when I smile at others through my mask. Heck, I’d even be happy to see a frown on a fellow shopper, so I could turn it upside down. I remember those expressions on Christmases of the past. Where a naughty shopper would scowl as someone cut in line. Or the smile of a comforting grin on a nice shopper’s face as they let me go first because I only had one item?

Tizzie will be good, treasures are safe with her guarding them.

Yes, I know, it’s better to be nice and stay masked when out and about. I just wish masks didn’t make people shout to get their questions answered or struggle to hear the checkout person tell them the amount due.

As I drove to Kohl’s to pick up an online order yesterday, I listened to Christmas songs on the radio while I dodged traffic, ‘cuz there’s plenty of big-box store shopping happening.

I sang along with my favorites, to get into the groove of being a long-distance Santa Claus who’ll send gifts via courier mail instead of wrapping them up, hiding them until Christmas morning, and placing them under our tree for our kiddos to see. I’ll Be Home For Christmas coming true is on my wish list for sure.

Santa Claus is Coming to Town was always a favorite song to sing with my kids and my mom.

I put out Mom’s table top decorations – these treasures are well over 50 years old.

Our Kiddos Won’t Be Coming to Town

I better watch out

I better not cry

Better not pout

I’m telling myself why

But sigh, our kids aren’t coming to town

They’ve made an Amazon wish list

I’ve checked it twice;

Gonna find out Who’s naughty and nice

Our kids aren’t coming to town

We won’t see them while they’re sleeping

We’ll see them via zoom instead

I know if they’ve been bad or good

They’re always good for goodness sake!

O! I better watch out!

I better not cry

Better not pout

I’m telling you why

I’ve finished my shopping list, wrapped each gift, skipped bows so they fit nice and tight in the postal packages. We’ll be there with them in spirit Christmas morning via the gift boxes sent to their town.

Santa Claus (mom and dad) will be coming to their town!

Post Inspiration – Linda G. Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday – ‘list‘.

PS – What is your favorite song to sing at this time of year? Have you finished your decorating yet? How about your shopping?

Published by Shelley

Letting my quirk out one post at a time.

63 thoughts on “Empty Nest Santa Confesses to Losing Spirit of The List”

  1. 2020 is certainly one for the record books…sending you tons of happiness and Christmas cheer your way even though it may look and feel a bit different this year. Merry Christmas and here’s to a very happy 2021!

    1. Yes it’s a year with records all around. Thank you so much for sending happiness and cheer my way – right back at ya, April, it’s always so nice to hear from you. I hope you and yours have a very Merry Christmas and that 2021 brings much joy to you. xx

  2. 2020 just plain old stinks. The whole situation makes me so sad, not being able to be with my family this Christmas hurts plenty. 2020, the year of isolation and sadness. I don’t decorate for any holiday, Shelley.

    1. I agree with you John. I know how you love to travel to Michigan to see the family. I hope you’re finding ways to virtually stay connected.
      Well … you do kind of decorate for season changes, your backyard always looks so nice and inviting.
      I wish you moments of joy despite the crappy year we’re having – I know I appreciate hearing from you and seeing what sights you’ve found to share in LV! I just hope that next year isn’t a repeat of the insanity! xx

      1. Thank you, Shelley! All any of us can do is hope and pray that next year will see the end of the virus. I’ve been texting my dad every day since he got home from his knee surgery. Going to be a while before he can walk without the walker. Thank God that my sister is there to care for him!

        1. You’re welcome. I have a hunch it’ll be gone by summer.
          I’m glad you’re dad’s surgery went okay and that your sister is there to take care of him. That’s awesome that you two can text back and forth. I know you’d be there if you could this year.

  3. So sorry you are having such a rough time. I went the total opposite direction refusing to let it get me down. Bought another small tree to put up in my beach bathroom. It has ornaments from the ocean on it, starfish, whales, sharks, seahorses, etc.

    1. Thank you, Anita. For the most part, I do okay, it’s just when I really think hard about how the virus keeps winning despite the ‘efforts to stop’ it, makes me wonder WTH are we doing wrong and maybe we’re on the wrong path afterall. I don’t care for the blaming and shaming of each other, it definitely doesn’t feel like the world is full of kindness.
      I’m so happy to see you’ve found much joy in the decorating for the season. That ocean/beach bathroom sounds delightful. Share your link here so I can see it!!
      Merry Christmas to you and yours – I am so thankful for your kindness and visit here to share your thoughts. xx

  4. Answers to your questions: I bark along with the Singing Dogs on “Jingle Bells.” We don’t decorate for Christmas, mostly because we’re lazy. The way we handle Chrtistmas, Mary buys her presents and thanks me, I buy my presents and thank her.

    I’m sorry you won’t get to see your family over the holidays. Seems the cure is worse than the disease…

    1. LOL – barking dogs for Jingle Bells, I had completely forgotten about that version!
      I really wanted to be lazy this year, so I compromised and put out even less and went with the faux tree. Each year it seems I take less and less out for the holidays. It does make it easier to transition to the new year. We both said it felt like we had just taken stuff down and we were putting it back up. This year is a blur for us. And, we’re the same, I buy what I want and Mr. buys what he wants. We haven’t really exchanged presents since our kids were born. Why start a new trend?!
      Thank you – I agree, the cure is worse than the disease, I fear we’ve done way too much damage that will continue to wreak havoc on those we’re trying to protect, IMHO.

      1. If you like to decorate, fine. We knew a couple that went hogwild decorating their living room every year. It was fun going to their house with it all decorated like that, but that was enough for us. It’s like the old saying goes, “you do you.”

        By the time all this Covid-19 business is over, I’m afraid that more people will die from the things we did to keep people from dying than from the disease itself. As it is, kids are falling way behind in school, and that’s something that will be felt much longer than the year or so it takes to get rid of the disease. ..

        1. I didn’t go hog-wild this year and it feels great. I’m anticipating how quickly the tear-down will go. I had a few friends like that and we had a restaurant/hotel that would decorate every inch of their place. It was, as you said, fun but enough for us to just view it instead. I do love seeing how much joy it brings those that do so for themselves.

          I’m fearful of the same things John – while Covid-19 is a real virus, the deaths associated with other ramifications is beyond the actual deaths from the disease. And the kids – I’m so thankful to not have young kids right now. China is back to normal a year after it hit. Hmm …

  5. I’ve been pretty much howling “We Need a Little Christmas” for about three weeks now, since Alexa will play it on demand. DH got sick of it and pulled out his lovely Christmas music collection, which is soothing and pleasant in the background. Once we get closer to Christmas, I’m not sure what I’ll be singing. This is a really strange holiday season. BUT, we have elderly (besides us, I mean) and really want them to be around next year. 🤷‍♀️ My tree went up weeks ago and has no ornaments…today could be the day.

    My packages to England were shipped and have arrived – woo hoo! I was thrilled with that since an earlier gift package took three months (no, I’m not kidding). I filed a lost parcel complaint and the PO sent me a note saying it was lost. LOL. It showed up while I was visiting. What can I say?

    Thank goodness for Zoom and FaceTime…it’s imperfect but much better than long distance on a land line, as my parents and grandparents had.

    1. Howling with Johnny Mathis and Alexa! You’re in great company. We don’t have an Alexa, we feel our phones spy on us enough. 😉 We’ve finally broke down and are listening to the radio station that has been playing Christmas songs since before Thanksgiving.
      I’ve been singing along as I wander around the house looking for a task that would bring joy. Trying to make a toy mouse for my grand-kitties didn’t work, maybe I need to retry?!
      That’s awesome your packages made it there before the holidays! Wouldn’t it be interesting if your other package was on the same plane with you ;-).
      Yes, thank goodness for Zoom and FaceTime (and Facebook Rooms – which work quite well, I was surprised!) I agree, it would definitely be a bummer to just have the phone. That’s all my dad has. I had the opportunity to see him in a less than 15 minute, outside, social distancing, mask moment this past weekend. He and his sweetheart are doing okay, but have definitely declined over the past 9 months. I hope the elderly that we’re protecting do survive until next year, I fight with my doubts that it’ll happen often. We are social creatures and we need socialization to survive.
      So … now I’m curious, did the ornaments find their way to your tree? My friend’s family decorated theirs over the weekend, put the last ornament on and 30 seconds later the tree toppled over and broke a couple one-of-a-kind glass ornaments. 🙁 Such is 2020!
      Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. I wish you and yours and your family abroad much joy this holiday season! Happy caroling to you and DH (and Alexa) xx

      1. Yes…my tree finally has ornaments. 🙂 It’s a smaller tree, so I used less, but I need to weed through them anyway, send some to my grown kids and donate those that aren’t favorites. We’ve also been walking in our neighborhood at night and man, there are some people who really go HOG WILD. That’s not us. But it’s fun (and sometimes overwhelming) to see what other people have done. Clark Griswold is alive and well. 😂

        I hope you and your family can share some fun with electronic connections. Happy holidays!

        1. Yay for small trees! My kids have their own box of ornaments they accumulated from birth to empty nest escape already, and I have put out mine in 3 years. I’ve been putting on plastic bulbs and that’s it. Simple has been a blessing.
          We need to drive around and see our lights. Our town has a list of locations floating around on Facebook. I guess there’s a Clark in everytown. LOL!
          I hope you’re sharing fun with your family too – happy holidays to you and yours! xx

  6. I totally understand your feelings. We will just have the five of us as we did on Thanksgiving. We usually have my mom over for at least one of those holidays. We got our real tree yesterday and will spend the next few days decorating.

    1. Thank you for your compassion, Janet. It’s so nice that the five of you are able to be together and with your mom too.
      YAY for the real tree. I hope your dog likes protecting it instead of ransacking it like a cat may do.
      Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. xx

  7. Beautiful little tree and decorations. Looks like the kitties are being well behaved (at least in the photo). It will be so different here too, as we won’t be going anywhere and everyone will be in their own homes. thank goodness we have facetime on our phones. 🙂

    1. Thank you, Barbara, I appreciate you sharing your thoughts. Yes, the cats have been behaving this year. Mr. told me that a real tree smells more fun to them than one from China. He’s right.
      I’m thankful for Facetime/Zoom and SnapChat, and the phone so I can call my dad who doesn’t have any of that.
      I wish you and yours joy and well-being. xx

  8. Like everything else this year, Christmas will be different. We’re ok, I think it makes us focus on the deeper meaning. I haven’t started listening to Christmas music yet, but I have watched A Christmas Carol.

    1. Excellent point, Dan – focus on the deeper meaning. I’ve got the local radio station’s playlist down pat now – it appears to repeat quite often the longer I listen to it. I don’t give up trying to sing along. That entertains Mr. who can sing, and Copper can’t hear so he sleeps through it. I’m ready to start watching some movies, I love A Christmas Carol too!

  9. We’re putting our tree up today. But I was just talking to my older son today. We’re not even that far away, and yet we won’t be able to have him over for Christmas. With cases rising, here, they have banned gatherings of any size, unless of the same household or, for those who live alone, of the 1 or 2 people you see regularly. That doesn’t include us, since we’ve all been staying apart for the last few months. The wife of someone he works with has just tested positive. It’s too close for comfort. Let’s hope the vaccine comes soon and that, in the meantime, we can get the case counts lower. Hope you have a good holiday anyway. And that 2021 will be an improvement!

    1. Aw, thank you for sharing your thoughts Sue. I hope the tree setting up session brought you some joy. That’s such a shame that you’re unable to see your son who lives so close. Is it warm enough for you to see each other outside? I’m sure our suggested limitations will be much the same. Wisconsin stats keep growing. I hear we’ll be receiving the shipments of the vaccine soon.
      I hope you and your hubby have a nice holiday too. I’m with you on hoping for a 2021 that helps us clear the bad memories of 2020! xx

      1. Yes, having the house decorated does make a difference. As for seeing my son, the restrictions right now even apply to outside and the really don’t want us travelling between cities, even hear ones. We’re hoping to get together later in January. Vaccinations are starting here, but it will be a long time, I think, before they get to those of us not particularly at risk. Oh well. We will be patient.

        Thanks for the good wishes. I hope you have a nice holiday season and new year as well.

        1. Your decorations look so nice, you did a great job and the new additions are lovely choices.
          Wow – you do have strong restrictions. I hope later in January you can get together.
          Thank you for the hope in your wishes! xx

          1. Thanks. Well the restrictions are primarily social, though, and masks. Stores and restaurants are open. You can even go out for a meal, as long as you’re only with your own household or bubble. Not so bad, really.

  10. We are moving on 12/14 so the decorating will have to wait. I am Grateful my children live nearby and will spend time with us. The younger son will come stay with us for at least a week. He will take care of putting up the tree. Part of me wants to decorate and another part of me just doesn’t care. Like so many other things that didn’t seem to matter or be worth my time this year, Christmas is feeling like a chore.
    So sorry you won’t be able to have your kids come home for Christmas. Hoping you and Mr can find a new way to enjoy the holidays.

    1. WOW – I can’t imagine trying to move at this time of the year. Way to take on a challenge. I hope the move goes well and that your tree looks grand in your new home. I’ve struggled with the ‘chore’ factor as well. I’m glad I didn’t put the pressure on myself to do too much.
      We’re doing as best as we can for the holidays. It does help that we’re introverts that stressed a lot when we’d have too much going on during the holidays.
      I wish you much joy and well-being, and a safe move to your new home! xx

  12. Those treasures are precious and the Christmas tree looks very nice. I know this year everything has changed. Take care and a very happy Christmas 🙂

  13. Oh gosh Shelley! Those icicles on your tree sent me back to when I was a kid decorating the tree. I love that you’re keeping it retro with those. It’s so cool. I’m not decorating or really doing anything for Christmas this year. Hubs’ birthday is the 24th, so maybe make a bigger deal of that since we won’t be having people over. Merry Christmas to you!!

    1. Yay – someone else remembers the icicles. We’ve put them on our tree for over 30 years. Some of them are even older than that. We use them year after year after year. A few go by the wayside via a cat who eats them, other than that they’re what puts the icing on the tree :-)!
      Happy Birthday to your Hubs, Mr.’s birthday is that week too. No big party for him he said, he feels like he’s still 30. Merry Christmas to you and yours – keep smiling! xx

  14. I am trying not to think about Christmas. But we have just a few of the decorations out but it’s hard to get in the spirit. Alternate universe is what this is. Your photos are so sweet and good for you setting up a tree, even if a small one. My husband got out the collection of holiday CDs, so that’s a start! Hang in there. I like your new lyrics. 🙂

    1. Thanks, glad you liked my lyrics ;-)! I hope your holiday CD collection got you in the spirit more. I’m not enjoying the alternate universe we’re living on, but when I ‘forget’ momentarily about it, I can find some joy this season. I even played a bit with my camera and Mr. and I sat on the couch with some holiday cheer and listened to Christmas songs last night. Our little empty nest felt a little more ‘normal’ for a bit. I bet your glad like I am that we took the risk to see the family this summer. 😉
      Hang in there – we WILL get through this!! xx

      1. I’m still working on getting into the spirit, which may or may not happen. Sigh. Yes! I am SO glad we had our “covidcation” with our “kids” over the summer. I think of it often. We just found out that we won’t be seeing them for Christmas. Even driving, they feel it’s too risky (for us). First time ever spending the holiday without them. Trying to hang in there. You too. 🙂

        1. Aw – I bet you’re remembering how dear that summer get together was. I’m sorry they’re not coming home for Christmas. It’s our first time without our kids too. It sucks almost as much as COVID sucks. I hope your virtual celebration brings you moments of joy. Remember you can leave your jammie bottoms on and put on a fancy sweater on top so you look like you’re okay with it?! 😉 Hugs to you! xx

          2. I hope it went okay – ours was weird, but nice in a way too. The weather was horrible, so I was glad they weren’t traveling in it. Hugs to you!

  15. We will be having a Zoom Christmas. Dan wants a tree, so we will get one, but not until mid-month as I like to leave it up until New Year’s Day. No Holiday Party this year, which has been so much fun. We gather in the lobby of our NYC apartment building, sharing pot luck dishes, wine and seasons greetings. With about 60 apartments, and most people at least dropping by, it’s like a small town festival! Oh well,
    so far no coronavirus cases in the building and we want to keep it that way. I will miss seeing my new grandson in LA, and my other grandson’s first “real” Christmas now that he is 2 and old enough to understand and anticipate the fun. Let’s hope we are all here and sharing our holiday plans next year due to our caution this time around!

    1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts Ms. D. I hope the tree you’ve put up by now has brightened your spirits. Wow – that sounds like a small town festival of fun. You’re right, I hope all are here next year to celebrate the revival of the party.
      I hope your virtual parties with family and those grandkids warm your heart. 2 is such a fun age, I long to hear those squeals of delight in person again sometime.
      I wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas – stay well and safe! xx

  16. My usual 12/25 activity is to board a local train with my dear cuz and his wife and visit my step-sister and her oldest son in her warm, woodsy Connecticut house. Sometimes another nephew Gabe and partner join us. We celebrate my birthday with a lovely lunch followed by a video we all somehow manage to agree on.

    It’s a great way to take the sting out of my birthday’s being all but lost in the glad tidings of someone else’s religion, a lot of whose members don’t even like my peeps! But this year I’ll be alone in my apt, with a few smarmy birthday calls from people I do love, but still … and nothing to shield me from the dull ache of empty Christmas feelings. So … Better watch out!

    1. I remember your traditional birthday plans are always so special for you, I’m sad for you that you can’t be doing what you’d rather be doing. I’ve been thinking of you a lot lately. Last year you were prepping for your big party – wow, what a difference a year makes. I hope next year at this time we’re celebrating with much joy! Happy Hanukka, Ellen xx

      1. Shelley, your comment made me laugh out loud — not because of your kind wishes, which were much appreciated, but because there are 475 ways to spell Chanukah, and you managed to find a brand new one! My laugh, BTW, is a warm, heartfelt laugh, and an appreciation, really and truly, of any Christmas-celebrating person who makes the effort to wish one a happy Hannukah, given all the many ways to spell it. That takes courage — whereas Crismis is easy!

  17. The shopping is SO NOT FUN now. I like to shop in person, and small, but know I probably shouldn’t. So, I’ve bought some stuff to make Jeff Bezos that much richer. I need a new laptop, so that’s necessary but not exactly exciting. I am happy to be singing/cantoring at Mass on Christmas Eve, and I get to pick what hymns I want to sing–because I’m the only one singing. So, I decided on “Lo, How a Rose E’er Blooming,” which is one of my favorites. I miss singing with my choir, but it’s something. When I was a kid, my grandma would come over for Christmas and she and my mom would play carols on the piano and we’d all sing. After the pandemic is over, I plan to get my boys piano lessons, so eventually SOMEONE will be able to play here.

    1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Yeah, Jeff has benefited more than he should’ve got this year. I hope the local shops survive.
      Way to get to sing – that’s a beautiful song.
      My grandma did the same thing around the piano – I still have her sheet music. I always sang along too (off-key didn’t matter to her) – I love listening to the sound of the piano. I was wondering yesterday about all of the piano teachers – have they tried to do virtual trainings too? Or did they end up quitting their services? I hope the boys enjoy the idea and that next year you’re singing carols together around your own piano. 🙂

  18. We really don’t celebrate Christmas in the traditional sense anyway, so not much will be different this year for us (although, we often travel during the holiday, so there’s that). I know I’d feel much differently if we had kids and grands. I have to say making the decision several years ago not to exchange gifts with anyone, has really gotten rid of the stress and let us focus on more important things. (P.S. your kitty is adorable.)

    1. Janis, thank you for sharing your thoughts. I agree with you on the stress. This year I don’t feel it as much as usual. So there’s that for a positive note for the season.
      I hope our kids enjoy the small effort I’ve made to make sure they’ve got some gifts to open Christmas morning. It’ll be different, but I’ll focus on the important parts like you said, that’s a good way to look at things.
      Dessy appreciates the kudos. She’s behaving nicely this year so she can get more treats. LOL!

        1. Yes, they are. Indeed we’ll have plenty to say about 2020. I bet you’ll be able to find things to use in your stories. You’ve done a great job of that so far!

  19. I loved the teddy bears Shelley and you and I have discussed your mom’s love of them and mine too – I collected them for years (until I ran out of space). Your Christmas tree is pretty and you have done better than me who has a stuffed moose sitting on the corner cabinet at eye level to where I sit at the kitchen table with the laptop and that is is. People are going crazy this year with real trees and holiday decor … that’s a good thing.

    1. Thanks Linda. Yes, I remember you love bears too.
      We’re finding more affection for the small tree this year. Maybe you can get a small tree at the grocery store to sit by your moose to keep him company?
      It’s fun to hear that people are getting into the groove of the holiday. I hope the optimism overwhelms the gloom and doom soon!

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