Here’s the secret…the one not shared with you in the ‘you can build a blog in 10 minutes sales pitches…you can build a blog (not that fast)…but you won’t have any followers unless you be the one to tell others about your blog.
That is the way to go if you want followers or readers, aka, blogging friends.
Tell people about your blog!
The day I pressed launch on my blog was a lonesome day indeed. Not a single soul read my blog post. (At least I didn’t hear from anyone…so I’m assuming so…).
I bought into the thought that just because I posted on the internet someone would read it.
Silly me…
So, yeah, I’ll say it again, you have to advertise to your friends that you’ve started a blog and invite them to visit your blog…!
But that’s scary…just like an introvert on the first day of school…(thank you for the analogy, dear new blogging friend at OneLetterUp) in order to make friends, you have to be a friend to others. Especially if you want to be a blogging friend. It’s a challenge for us introverts, trust me! But it’s an essential part of blogging.
So who was the first person I told about my blog? Not a stranger, it was one of my dearest friends, Kris, at Anew Wellness. I broke the news to her over a glass of wine.
On that day I blurted (it happens with wine bravery…), “So yeah, I’m going on an adventure, I’m going to let my hair go gray, and I’m going to blog about it…and I’m beyond excited…”
“I’m so happy for you, you’ll look great, and I can’t wait to read your blog. Cheers to you dear friend!”
A friend is someone who give you total freedom to be yourself. – Jim Morrison
She read my first blog post about going gray and commented right away. She supported my double trouble adventures, just like she has done all the years we’ve been friends. (Remember the secret from above…because I told her I wrote a post about it, she was enlightened to watch for it and read it, aka, I invited her to read my blog post…).
And then, I just kept blogging (and going gray), but I didn’t tell anyone I was doing so. I just wrote, and wrote, and wrote…but I stayed silent about my efforts. You can’t hide gray hair for long, so to distract from that, I thought it best to talk about the blog, right?! Later that year I told my other dear friends, who aren’t bloggers, about my blog. I can only assume since they are my dear friends, they do read it, and for that I’m grateful.
We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone. – Orson Welles
I had no idea about fellow bloggers being an option for friendship, let alone want to read my posts. Until a little over 8 months later, on a glorious day, I heard from a fellow blogger. Not on WordPress mind you, she writes on Blogger. Yeah, there are other platforms out there, if you stick to just WordPress you’ll find a lot of blogging friends, but there are other communities, so I’ve found…anyhoo…
I was lonesome on my going gray journey and joined a community of supporters on Facebook. I had given into the long journey of 9 months of going gray. I had gotten to the point where I had to chop off the rusty weird look that didn’t go with the top of my head of silver strands of hair. The chop gave me a sense of freedom and a surge of strength.
I blogged about it hoping some stranger might appreciate the points I shared. With all strangers in the new group, I felt I had joined a crowd of incredibly supportive peeps, so I thought, “What the heck…keep on being brave.” In a moment of ballsy extroversion, I posted the link and invited others to read my blog post on the Facebook page called Gray and Proud.
It was a hot flash moment, full on sweat attack, grab a towel to dry off, holy crap I posted my blog link…what if no one reads it kind of moment.
Not everyone who posts on that page has a blog, and bloggers seem to be unique in wanting to comment on other blogs, so when I shared a blog post on Facebook all I received were some likes and comments there, but nothing on my blog. (Don’t get me wrong, I adored the likes…I so needed the support of strangers at that time in the journey)!
But that day it changed….a miracle happened. I received my first blog comment from a stranger!
I was ecstatic to hear from Serena, and I’ve treasured her for taking the time to comment ever since. Thank you, Serena! I hope you know you made my blogging existence matter and that comment encouraged me to continue on.
There are no strangers here; only friends you haven’t yet met. – William Butler Yeats
My daughter was with me the day I discovered Serena’s comment. “What’s this little number next to comments in my menu…?” Oy…I had a lot to learn about the happiness of comments on a blog post!
Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. – Marcel Proust
Together, we did a happy dance of joy. And then we stood there staring at the screen, with our mouths open in awe…
“I did it, someone out there on the internet, that I don’t know in real life, actually read my blog…”
“I’m so proud of you mom, you met a blogger…way to go…see, your thoughts are appreciated. And…like I told you, you have to reach out to other bloggers, that’s the secret to growing your blog…!”
Post inspiration – Linda Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Post; #MyBlogMyWritingStyle 30 Day Blogging Challenge (rules here) word of the day Friendship and prompt thought “Write a post to thank the blogger who was your first friend.”
PS – Who is your first blogging friend? Have you thanked your first blogging friend lately for their support? What is your favorite friendship quote? If you want to find great blogging friends, you’ll enjoy Linda Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturdays!
It’s been a while since I wrote a “Thank You” post, so thank you for the reminder! I’ve found the blogging community to be so supportive–though it definitely took a while to find “my kind of people”–like you. I have a few followers who aren’t bloggers themselves, but by and large it’s bloggers who take the time to read others’ blogs–because they know how much time, sweat, and tears go into these posts. Nice one!
You’re welcome, thank you for reading AND for all your support. You are so kind, generous, and encouraging with your comments. I wish I could be that good at it!! Yes, we do know how much work it is and how hard it is to find our kind of people, I’m thankful our two paths have crossed!! I’m always happy to hear from you! xx
The quotes you inserted here… wonderful!
My first 2 blogs had few comments, and the like button didn’t exist (or I didn’t know about it). I used stats and site meter to watch for hits. Lurkers too (people who read but don’t want anyone to know they’re reading and therefore don’t comment or click like).
The dialogue is what makes for happy blogging. 😊❤
Thank you, Claudette! I did the stat and meter watching for a while, but it drove me too crazy! You’ve got it exactly right, the dialogue is what makes for happy blogging! :-)!!
Love the quote about friendship from Jim Morrison. I’m writing that one down. See, your blog is informative and inspiring:) Not sure how I found you but glad I did. Happy Saturday, Shelley.
Thank you, Janet, your kind words of encouragement are so appreciated! Every time you stop by I smile! I’m so glad you found your way to my blog and I’m glad I found my way to yours as well! Happy Saturday!
There are lots of good friendship quotes that basically boil down to “A friend is someone that will help you get rid of the body.”
LOL – well…that’s a new one I hadn’t heard…but you did make me smile, thank you!
I love your story and it is so true — you have to speak up if you want people to read, but I’ve found even wanting people to read is a leap of faith.
My first blogger friend was actually a high school friend of my husband’s. She has a blog on WP (hello, https://fourthgenerationfarmgirl.com) and was such an incredible resource as I was gearing up to launch. She tirelessly answered questions without once saying “seriously?? You’re SERIOUSLY asking me THAT?” and encouraged me from my very first post. Definitely wouldn’t be here without Tonya!!
Thank you, glad you enjoyed my first friend story. You’re right, it is hard stuff. Tonya has a great blog, thank you for sharing her link. How wonderful that you found her friendship and guidance during your start up and beyond! It is so nice to have helpers like that! I’m glad our paths have crossed, I appreciate your encouragement…and someday…you’ll need my help when you’re kicking the habit ;-)!
I had to look back to see and I am so glad I did because I had forgotten. My first comments came from two “real” life friends – Cat and TK. Cat sadly passed away this year. Rocked my world. Now I see her words of encouragement and my eyes are brimming with happy tears. Here is what she said <3:
Cathy says:
July 7, 2016 at 2:03 am EDIT
I took American Sign Language there and ended up working with my professor years later when I was at the Humane Society. I’m swimming like hell starting my career as a marketer but if I’m as clueless as Dory then I can’t be anything but happy. This career move in my late 40s really does feel like home despite the learning curve. I love the stories and can’t wait to read your next one.
Aw, that is so touching, I’m so grateful you shared your first comments with me. Real friendships are life-changing. I’m sorry for your loss of Cat, she’d no doubt be proud of how you’ve continued to grow. 🙂
Hi new blogging friend! I really liked this post 🙂
It is a wild new world out in blogging land. We are all so used to action=result in real life, that the lack of a response can be quite startling at the beginning. Your description of your first post…yes it IS lonely. But also like “here I am jumping off a bridge and nobody noticed” (well, with a safety net of course). My first comment from a fellow “stranger” blogger was from Irene Waters (https://irenewaters19.com). She then became a follower. Wow! Such encouraging words – and I have enjoyed her Times Past challenges (which I hope return soon!). As always, Shelley, such enjoyable reading – I also loved the quotes.
Thank you, I’m happy you enjoyed the post and that you found Irene (she found you) too! I love her blog and photos! You’re so kind and welcoming and your comments are supportive and encouraging – you’re well on your way to happy growth for your blog! I’m happy to be a blogger friend of yours!!
I’ve found that when I tell my friends about my blog, they log on, read about me and then instantly become judgemental. And NOT in a good way. I won’t even tell my sister anymore about my blogging. My kids couldn’t care less.
I’ve found that the title of each post is what draws readers in (Google quickly classifies it). The most inciteful or bizarre the title, the more readers. Such as: ‘Common housewife discovers alien substances oozing out of her kitchen sink after her husband leaves town” When people read the article, they quickly find out I’m talking about ‘comet’ and what a great cleaner it is, now that hubby is on a business trip and I finally have some time to clean!
Works every time.
LOL!
Blogging does seem to be a thing that isn’t for everyone! Sorry you’ve received criticism, I have received mostly silence, so I’ll take that I guess ;-)! Yeah, the title is important, and I’ve stumbled upon a few good ones now and then, but mostly that is something I wish I could do better! LOL – I’ll have to pay attention to that more. Thank you for the hot tip!
My first blogging friends were all book bloggers. I stumbled on their FB page and asked 100 questions. They were so generous and helpful. I still follow all of them, and they follow me. Your page is such a wonderful resource. I have been away for almost 2 weeks, and am just now getting a chance to catch up.
That’s a great way to meet people too! Thank you, glad you find benefit in my posts. Wow – I hope you had a great and relaxing time!! I’m glad you stopped by to say hi upon your return!